Wouldn't it be nice to see what the gay issues are elsewhere? What happens in our own nook of the world is all that counts, but it could be well worth to spend a couple of minutes stepping in the shoes of a colleague from out there. Here is one, from Sweden, found at random on Internet, and his thoughts, translated by us here from the language of "honor and heroes" into what we can all understand.

Since eight years back Sweden has laws regulating partnerships. At this time, Sweden goes further than any other country as to equality between straights and gays/lesbians in respect to its laws concerning international adoptions. Today Sweden has a handfull of openly homosexual members of congress, and they influence decisions in a progressive direction on many issues, above all to reduce the amount of drama and to add normalcy. Soon it may be time for the first openly homosexual cabinet minister and then the first party chairman. Of course that day will arrive sooner or later.

And naturally, the next step will be that society no longer has separate partnership laws but rather marriage laws applying to all couples, whether their genders are opposite or same.

There was a big hullabaloo in TV, radio, and the press when I came out as an openly homosexual member of congress and a deputy party leader of the Center Party. That was not many years ago but it seems ancient now that open homosexuality is everyday fare. Not to mention how it was at the time when I became engaged for the first time (to a girl who later became the mother of my children). It was great progress when, in the late 70's, the Department of Health and Welfare removed homosexuality from the list of registered disease conditions. A good deal has happened since then.

I feel the big difference in my own life. I am a father of three children, remarried to Tomas, and work as Director General of the Board of Integration. What distinguishes my life most is not that I am a homosexual. It is indeed one indicator of my identity, but not the biggest one. In earlier times it was more important, simply because there are fewer obstacles these days. Thresholds are sinking, doors are opening, and oppression is decreasing.

The partnership law is one example of decisive change. There is no doubt that laws affect attitudes and reduce discrimination. Today I say that "of course I will bring with me the man I am married to", and people can think whatever they want. We live our lives as we see fit anyway, and people can not stop us. We have the law behind us. And then people notice very quickly that they don't have any reason at all to want to stop us.

"Normalcy" is good, even if I don't think highly of being normal. Luckily enough, I have never met a normal person. I have only met people who are different. Every individual is a small minority group. However, "normalcy" concerns mostly the issue of equal opportunity. The decision about homo-adoption was not extreme but rather a question of equal opportunity.

Important steps have been made. This in spite of my experience that majority rule always has difficulty understanding the conditions of minorities. One feels so comfortable in one's own strong position, that one doesn't seriously consider the problems faced by minority members. This applies to ethnic, cultural, religious, and sexual minorities.

But how is it in the homosexual community? Meaning one of the minority communities. One way to protect oneself from remaining oppression is to create one's own world of glamor. Worshipping the teenage looks with rosy cheeks, recoiling at the sight of one's own wrinkles in the mirror, spending a fortune on expensive miracle-working skin creams and solarium tans (which only speeds up the wrinkles -- what a trap!). If one does not qualify for a slot in the hierarchy of the majority rule, then one can always create one's own inflexible hierarchy -- where some will sit on sky-high pedestals and others will dwell far, far down below. Where heroes are embraced as ideal and beautiful, soon to be bypassed by new times, new winds, new tinsel. Other personalities will create new hierachies with new uncontrolled idealization. Straights who "fight" for homosexual rights will be adored: "They support us, imagine that!" To be homosexual can never be as good as to be straight? Right?

Now that oppression is diminishing around us -- finally -- maybe it's time to clean up a little in our own homo-house!

Andreas Carlgren | andreas.carlgren@integrationsverket.se